Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
