I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
When we got into his bed, his damn parrot started making sex noises in the other room
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
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