Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
