Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
But for real, I had the best sex of my life on that bunk bed
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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