Someone shit on the floor
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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