I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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