If i come over, it means nothing
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
Are you sure you didn't shit in my back yard?
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Randomize
