ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
is it cool if i crash at ur house this weekend again bro
yea dude but i wld bring a sleeping bag or something just in case. or u may just have to shack up with a woman or 2 cuz we hav 10 girls visiting/staying over at my house.
how did u manage to make sleeping with a bunch of girls sound like an inconvenience?
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
