so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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