Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Why are there four guys spooning on the living room floor?
They're still there? Shit. They were supposed to leave after they hugged it out.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize