I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
I went to Walmart last night to buy some CDs--which is a sentence I never thought I'd say in 2016.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
