i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
When you wake up so hungover that you don't even wanna cough for fear of vomiting... It's not gunna be a good day.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize