I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
