Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
New BDSM fun fact. When you get spanked hard enough with a flat object, you get welts. Welcome to thunderdome, bitches.
50% drunk capacity currently
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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