Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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