No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I'm not sure what happened. There's a frozen waffle in the floor and he's walking around with a curtain rod and making planes out of bread slices...
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
