I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
The struggles of a small town man whore
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
