I hope mine doesn't look like that
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Randomize
