I almost hooked up with this girl last night. she had a tattoo of a cardinal next to her cooter. said it reminded her of her grandpa
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
i came on her dog
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
