there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
