He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
Randomize
