he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
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