I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
It was like giving head to a cactus.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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