i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
