I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize
