Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
