Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize