Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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