what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
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