This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I was more obsessed with the sweat stain on her back that was simultaneously shaped like a vagina and the virgin Mary.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
yeah i wanted to show him what i was missing, so i decided to send him a seductive picture, like the ones where the girls are eating strawberries and whipped cream. well i didn't have those, so i sent him a picture of myself naked eating a bagel
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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