i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
