google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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