i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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