she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Have you ever had chicken nuggets while high? Because it tastes like hearing the Beatles for the first time
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
