Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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