don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
