did you get engaged???
if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
Too much dab too little lung dying 😵😵😵
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
