You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
i just looked at the calendar to see when spring break is and literally stopped eating
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
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