I molested 6 butterflies tonight
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
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