But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Randomize
