Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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