You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
