i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
If I pissed all over some chicks bed I would probably apologize for getting so wasted, not putting out, and turning into a god damn R. Kelly Cinderella... Not ask for coffee and a ride home.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
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