She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Randomize
