Don't you send me to vm
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
