THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
Randomize
