So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
3pm strippers are depressing
Also I think my taxi driver may have just died and we just happen to be on a 35 mph cruise control on 395...
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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