Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
