I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
so it turns out that "condoms galore" does, indeed, come up on your bank statement
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
