You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Randomize
