just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
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