omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I think I fucked someone on the flight home last night.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
