There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
Dude, we're at Einstein's Bagels and the dude next to us is spreading cannabutter on his bagel.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
the problem with having sex for lunch when its 98 degrees outside is that I can't tell if its sweat or semen running down my leg as I walk back in the office
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
