I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize
